Is your team missing out by not having a certain danger warning system in place?

Let me ask you a series of questions:

1.Do you have an organisational-wide view of the status of your numpty danger warning management system?

2. How do you currently know what the current Numpty danger levels are in your organisation?

3. How are numptys being managed on a day-to-day basis?

Don’t worry if your responses to these questions are no, no and they aren’t, because you are not alone. Almost every organisation, business units and team does not maintain a ‘Numpty Danger Rating’ warning system.

Luckily, there is a simple, easy to implement solution immediately available:

The Numpty Danger Warning System or NDWS.

The NDWS is your ideal method to use to communicate impact [in this case, the impact of a numpty being present] to your team so they are aware and feel encouraged to take mitigatory action against the Numpty. It utilises a rating series which provides a measure of the forecasted level of numpty you and your team will be facing at any given moment. The rating series employ calculations which apply local knowledge and information received to a simple equation enabling you to predict the likelihood of a numpty appearing, their behaviour and impact and the ease of suppression or eradication.

The final calculation is then be translated into a Numpty Danger Level, which is visually communicated through the use of Numpty Danger Signs located around your organisation. These signs indicate the current class of numpty alert risk .


In addition to these danger signs, you should also ensure your organisational communications are designed to provide backup and instruction on appropriate behaviour to compensate for the different levels of numpty danger.

There is of course, various limitations to employing numpty danger alert systems, mostly relating to confusion amongst staff about what constitutes Numptiness. This is why a very clear ‘warning system’ should be employed to provide rapid visual indications to staff in order to help influence them to either change behaviours, or encourage them to intercede with mitigating actions to remove the numpty, and Numptiness, from the immediate area.

How does it work?

The NDWS visual platform provides a team-wide overview of the forecasted level of numpty and numptiness you and your team are currently facing. The danger board is a control panel which shows the status of the perceived numpty status and enables you to monitor the progress of Numpty Suppression Actions. Furthermore, the NDWS allows you to compare how numpties and numptiness is suppressed on different sites and this allows you to benchmark your team.

How to identify and calculate the degree of numptiness?

The rating series calculation used are based on an ‘intuitive feeling of the potential of an outbreak of numptiness to occur, spread and then require Numpty Suppression Action or NSA’, supported by a simple but robust calculation:

ƒ [I, -K, ni, F] i

I     = The identified Numpty [A stupid person, an idiot1];
-K  = The degree of lack of subject or situational knowledge or misconception displayed;
ni  = The frequency or the number of times the numpty event occurs;
F    = The level of resolve the numpty has to stay their course of idiocy;
i  = your intuitive perception based on local knowledge and previous experience.

Please be aware there will be different interpretations of numpty risk when employing the above calculation. This is due to individual perception or lack thereof the threat. Therefore, it is recommended calculations and discussions of the final rating be conducted collectively, in a “less formal and friendly way”.

Use to inform required responses by visually indicating the forecasted danger level

By instantly communicating the forecasted numpty danger level the NDWS supports informed decision making about how to mitigate and suppress the numptiness being exhibited. This is the strength of the Danger Alert Board, as it provides a real time visual display of the calculated perceived danger level.

PicTURE 1: A numpty danger alert board being utilised
How to educate teams on how to mitigate numptiness

It is important to recognise not everyone will be a willing participant in the suppressing of numptiness, especially the numpty. However, it is still very important to make sure the acknowledgement of the dangers of unmitigated numptiness occurs. It is recommended teams raise public awareness through the utilisation of numpty self-help groups as an effective way of minimising long-term damage from the presence of a Numpty.

It is strongly recommended to keep any messaging simple; therefore, four-letter words are often best placed to ensure maximum interpretation by the Numpty.

Learn more and obtain your very own Numpty Danger Alert Board and System

Want to change your answers from no to yes?

To help you achieve this, you can access and download your very own Numpty Danger Warning System, with included Danger Alert Board here. Then you can start to forecast and track the numpty danger within your work environment. 


I would also like to thank and apologise to Helen Bones, H. Grant Pearce and Lisa Langer. It is their work on Forest Biosecurity and Protection which inspired the content and format of this blog.